Let's Tell a true story

A well-established doctor in society and family learned for the first time that the people he had been living with as his parents were not his real parents.

These parents had taken him from his biological mother one day after his birth and raised him with care, ultimately making him a doctor. According to their promise, they never met his real mother again. The doctor’s real father is unknown to them. The adoptive parents only know the real mother’s name and her village. 

After learning this, the doctor became extremely restless to find his biological mother. But when he found out that he was an unwanted child to her, he was devastated with grief. He kept thinking again and again—why should he search for such a cruel mother who abandoned him right after birth!

 At this point, a knowledgeable scholar informed him that this in no way reduced the status of his biological mother. According to the Qur’an and Hadith, he is still required to fulfill all duties and responsibilities toward his mother just like any other child; there is no permission in Islam to reduce even a tiny part of those obligations. 

The greatest duty in a person’s life is to worship Allah, and the next most important duty is to honor and respect one’s parents.

If you look at the commands of Allah in the Qur’an, it becomes very clear:

Surah An-Nisa (4:36): “Worship Allah and associate nothing with Him, and be good to parents…” 

Surah Al-Isra (17:23–24):

“Your Lord has decreed that you worship none but Him, and that you show kindness to parents. If one or both of them reach old age in your care, do not say to them even ‘uff’ (a word of disrespect), nor scold them, but speak to them with honor and respect.”

“And lower to them the wing of humility out of mercy and say: ‘My Lord, have mercy upon them as they brought me up when I was small.’”

Surah Luqman (31:14): “And We have enjoined upon man goodness to his parents. His mother carried him in weakness upon weakness, and his weaning is in two years. So be grateful to Me and to your parents; to Me is the final return.” 

A man asked the Prophet (ﷺ), “Who is most deserving of my good treatment?” He replied, “Your mother.” 

“Then who?”

“Your mother.” 

“Then who?”

“Your mother.” 

 The fourth time, he said: “Your father.” 

In explaining this narration, the well-known Islamic scholar Zakir Naik often says: the mother receives the gold medal, silver medal, and bronze medal, while the father receives only the consolation prize. 

The Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) was once speaking with his companions when an elderly woman arrived. Seeing her, the Prophet (ﷺ) immediately became attentive and respectfully spread his cloak on the ground for her to sit on. He then spoke to her with great honor and respect. When she left, the companions were surprised and asked, “Who is this woman to whom you showed such respect and affection?” The Prophet (ﷺ) replied, “She is my foster mother, Halimah.” He further explained that after Allah and His Messenger, the mother holds a very high status, and that Paradise lies under the feet of the mother. He also said that associating partners with Allah and mistreating one’s parents are among the major sins.

A man once sought permission from the Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) to participate in jihad. The Prophet (ﷺ) asked him, “Are your parents alive?” When he replied, “Yes,” the Prophet (ﷺ) said, “Then stay with them and serve them as best as you can.”

A hadith in Sahih Muslim: The Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) said, “May his nose be dusted with dust, may his nose be dusted with dust, may his nose be dusted with dust!” It was asked, “O Messenger of Allah, who?” He replied, “The one who finds his parents, either one or both of them, in old age and yet does not enter Paradise (by serving them and earning Allah’s pleasure).”

The greatest duty of gratitude in a person’s life is towards the Creator, and then towards one’s parents.